


spiral night

by singularitory



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, I Don't Even Know, I Tried, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Light Angst, M/M, also it's literally 4:29 am so rip, i love donghyuck and mark so, i promise its not really sad okay, lapslock, literally this is unedited im sorry, not super fluffy but whatever, spiral day
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-11
Updated: 2018-11-11
Packaged: 2019-08-22 01:23:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 536
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16588073
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/singularitory/pseuds/singularitory
Summary: donghyuck has off days. mark knows. he'll stay.





	spiral night

donghyuck likes to call them spiral days. the days where he’s so inexplicably blank and _ugh_ feeling. he doesn’t lay in bed crying, not at all. spiral days are more like a thick fog. they hover, covering the ground entirely.

instead of feeling the weight of the world on him. he simply feels nothing. donghyuck’ll stand in front of the studio mirror, face utterly blank, repeatedly practicing the same set of difficult choreography, thinking _why?_

_what the fuck am i even doing?_

on spiral days, donghyuck feels so indifferent. generally, he’s known to be boisterous, witty. he’s sunshine. but sometimes, he isn’t.

sometimes, he’s just lee donghyuck.

sometimes, he feels more like pluto. frozen and distant, yet remaining in constant orbit.

days like these, he’ll go back to the dorms after a fleeting day. oddly enough, spiral days tend to pass quickly, everything being a blur of nothingness. spiral nights aren’t the same.

he’ll shower quickly, throw on one of mark’s ratty hoodies. mark’s hoodies are always a little big on his older boyfriend, so they practically swallow the younger boy. _ironic,_ donghyuck’ll think to himself, thoughts drifting to how his mind seems to practically swallow him up as well.

eventually, he’ll curl up in bed, letting the grey sheets tickle his soft jawline. he’ll be fucking exhausted yet unable to fall asleep, his thoughts occupying him. he’ll stare at the darkened ceiling, contemplating every choice he’s made, every mistake he’s caused, pretending to himself that he is being completely objective and _not_ ridiculously subjective. until the door creaks open, splintering the glass of his scattered mind.

mark will climb into bed, whispering a breathy, “hyuck?”

donghyuck won’t respond, will simply rest his head in the crook of mark’s neck, breathing softly, signaling that he’s still awake. of course he is, sleeplessness is a bitch.

“spiral day?” mark will murmur quietly. donghyuck will nod, almost imperceptibility, into his boyfriend’s neck. the older boy’ll wrap his arms around the younger, reassuring donghyuck that he’s here. mark’s always there.

mark won’t say anything, doesn’t need to. he knows donghyuck, he knows he just needs the night to pass. mark will have noticed donghyuck’s silence throughout the day, knows not to interfere. he knows to let hyuck have the day breeze by, but to make sure to be by his side at night. to help ease the insecurities endlessly tormenting his younger boyfriend. donghyuck will seem so small in these hours, but mark knows he’s strong and needs time. mark knows and is willing to wait. wait with him and for him.

donghyuck hates spiral days, the silence that fills every corner of his life in those hours. but more so, he hates spiral nights when he feels everything and nothing at once. again, he doesn’t cry, he simply lays there, suffocating. suffocating from all the unknown burden that comes crashing down like a vast tsunami, overwhelming and all consuming.

but it’s okay. because mark will always be there, spirals or not. and maybe donghyuck’s not okay that day, but donghyuck will be. and mark will be by his side through it. so donghyuck will shut his eyes and eventually be lulled into sleep by his boyfriend’s even breathing.

**Author's Note:**

> so it's literally four fucking thirty in the morning and i wrote this instead of sleeping bc im a healthy functional human. anyways not sure if this is relatable for anyone other than myself but maybe someone'll get it. also again sorry for any mistakes, this was roughly edited by my sleep deprived self.


End file.
